An off-screen narrator, Mort Golden, takes us back to winter around 1980, the year he was 21. He and his two buddies, Tim and Danny, have a fateful trip over the bridge from Detroit into Canada. The three of them are going nowhere in life, although Mort has thoughts of being a writer, while his mom wants him to go to college. He and his pals contemplate making a quick fortune transporting drugs over the border in their beat-up Buick, "the war wagon." Mort's also hopelessly in love with a girl he dated briefly a couple years before. With border inspectors, Tim's temper, and Danny's bottled up emotions, is there any way this can end well?

Mort:
Rinny, your sister Fern. Does she brush her teeth? Because once she smiled at me and I swear I couldn't use my dick for like a year.

Anachronisms: The Renaissance Centre (built in 1977) is visible, years before it was built.

Written by Ritchie Blackmore, Ian Gillan, Roger Glover, John Lord, Ian Paice
Performed by Peter Himmelman
Published by Mauve Music, Inc.