Movie Quotes

[from trailer]


Zed:
You could be my right-hand man.


Oh:
I've seen what you do with your right hand. No, thank you.

[from trailer]

[a hunter knocks a bowl of berries out of Oh's hand]


Oh:
Well, there won't be any berries in the fruit salad now, so we all lose.

[from trailer]

[Zed has eaten an apple from the 'Tree of Knowledge']


Zed:
I might know everything. Ask me something!


Oh:
Where does the sun go at night?


Zed:
Pass. Next question.


Oh:
Where do babies come from?


Zed:
Pass. Next question.


Oh:
[noticing a snake] There's a snake on my foot.


Zed:
In the form of a question!


Oh:
[scared] There's a snake on my foot?


Zed:
Correct!

[from trailer]


Zed:
[pointing to wheels] What are these big, round things for?


Cain:
They're wheels, numbskull. They make the cart roll.

[Zed and Oh are riding on the cart, with their arms in the air]


Oh:
I feel like a bird!

Zed:
I'm sorry. I wasn't listening. All my brain blood was in my boner.

Oh:
I'm a virgin by choice.


Zed:
Ha! Not *your* choice!

Oh:
[Oh and Eema come back out after having sex] She's not a virgin anymore!


Eema:
He's not a virgin either.


Oh:
I saved a life with my love making!

Cain:
[to his father Adam, while trying to flee on a slow-moving camel] Eat my dust, father!

Oh:
If we never ever see you again, it's not because we are avoiding you!

Princess Inanna:
Come! Come quick!


Zed:
That won't be a problem.


Zed:
What are we doing here?


Princess Inanna:
I want you to enter the Holiest of Holies.


Zed:
Oh, that's quite a coincidence, because I want you to sit on the Poliest of Polies.

Cain:
What transpires within the confines of the walls of Sodom, stays within the confines of the walls of Sodom.

Oh:
I just want to lay with her so badly.


Zed:
I don't see it. I mean she's cute, but I don't think I'd lay with her.


Oh:
She's your sister. I mean, it would be like laying with your mother.


Zed:
Which was a *big* mistake, I see that now.

Zed:
Look, I want you to know... I blame myself for everything that's happened.


Maya:
Yeah, so does everybody else.

Abraham:
We are the Hebrews. Righteous people - not very good at sports.

Zed:
It seems like a waste of a perfectly good virgin to me...


Pedestrian Villager:
He guys, I'm trying to enjoy a sacrifice with my family. Do you mind? Do you mind?

High Priest:
Behind these doors is the Holiest of Holies, earthly domain of the gods. A place so ineffably sacred, so powerful, that he who enters... Instant death!


Oh:
Who cleans it?

Zed:
Hey, I'm peeing on my face too... on the inside!