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Ted & Venus

Ted & Venus

Ted & Venus Released 20 Dec 1991
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  • Director:Bud Cort
  • Writers:Paul Ciotti (screenplay) & Paul Ciotti (story)
  • Runtime:100 min
  • Language:English
  • Genre:Comedy   Drama
  • Country:USA
  • Company:Gondola Film

Photos

  • Ted & Venus Photo 1
  • Ted & Venus Photo 2

Cast

  • Bud CortTed Whitley
  • Vincent SchiavelliPublisher
  • James BrolinMax Waters (as Jim Brolin)
  • Mik ScribaPrison Guard
  • Woody HarrelsonHomeless Vietnam Veteran

Trivia

Henry Rollins wrote the poem read at the poetry reading.

Quotes

Ted Whitley:
I want a tube-top Venus who undulates my soul... and my shorts. I want a virgin whore who speaks perfect Chinese, and kisses French fluidly. I want a stainless steel boudoir with a velvety throne. I want a golden parakeet to shit on her soul. I want to loofah the pain and hurt from her ivory shoulder blades. I want a woman who's not afraid of making a right turn in a left lane. I want a pizza with all the trimmings. A steak tartar; hold the onions. Velvety images shrink with the rain. I want a drip-dry cunt that can take it again and again and again and again. I want a mast-head with breasts who screams out 'PIERCE ME! STEAL ME!'. Graveyards retch with the stink of one trillion broken hearts. Nobody gets out of here alive. I'll break your neck before you castrate me! Take this and scream out 'PIERCE ME! STEAL ME! SEIZE ME WITH YOUR WHITE HARD STEEL!'.

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With more than a million titles, it isn't feasible to handpick recommendations for every film. That's why we came up with a formula to suggest titles that fit along with the selected one. The formula uses factors such as user votes, genre and keywords to generate an automatic response. The system produces relevant results most of the time but since recommended titles are not manually chosen, occasionally they may include less than perfect matches.

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